Adoptees are not alone / Let’s think about the institution of adoption
This blog is primarily for adoptees. I write in hopes that people question what they know about adoption, develop compassion for the adoptee experience, and most of all, that adoptees with similar experiences, thoughts and feelings may find comfort in our shared reality. I hope this blog can be a resource for adoptees as we find our way.
I am the least likely person in the world to start a blog about my innermost thoughts.However, since the adoptee voice is unfortunately so often forgotten, ignored, silenced or pathologised in any conversation about adoption (despite the fact we adoptees live adoptee life every.single.day), I pushed myself to share mine.
I started this blog for all adoptees, but its main focus will be on the intercountry adoptee experience, because for me, it is difficult to separate adoption reality from the intercultural aspect.
My experience, my stories
This blog represents my views and first-hand experience as an adoptee and ‘ethnic’ minority. All adoptees have their own stories and views on adoption and may have been adopted in different circumstances. Like any group of people, adoptees are not identical. I DO NOT presume to speak for all adoptees. However I am aware that there are many adoptees whose experiences as an adoptee have been similar to mine, so I consider it important to share my stories here.
This blog is the product of me processing my own experiences, ongoing research and critical analysis, discussions with other adoptees about their experiences and my understanding of psychology, social justice, law and politics. I will say that while adoptees are all unique individuals, the reality is that many health professionals have found common patterns in the ways that many adoptees perceive, and behave in, the world. The cause of these patterns is open for debate, but the patterns exist.
Forget not our families
Another reason I started this blog was to increase understanding of birth mothers and their experience. There are many wonderful birth mothers in the world. I do not presume to know their first-hand experience, but I hope that by writing about my experiences with my birth family from the first-hand perspective of an adoptee, I can increase people’s understanding of the importance of the mother-child connection.
There are also many wonderful adoptive parents out there who want to help their adopted children. I hope this blog will help them understand what their child may be experiencing/may experience in the future. I did not have the words to explain my issues with adoption for the majority of my life so it was impossible to communicate it to my parents.
Communicate, advocate, share, join!
Talking about adoption is wholly personal and utterly complex. I sincerely recommend sharing your own story, joining an adoptee group or other venture and adding your voice to our adoptee community.
I note that I have written this blog with Australian society in mind. Consequently, there may be different political and social realities, different resources and different cultures that cause issues to play out differently in Australia as compared to other Western countries. In other cases, the issues faced by adoptees in Australia and other Western countries will be similar or the same.